Thursday, March 30, 2006

Venezuela vs The Netherlands: conflict in the Caribbean

El Presidente Chavez, the muy grande Maximo Jefe of Venezuela is making threats towards The Netherlands.

Come again?

Venezuela is threatening The Netherlands. A European country.

It is true, people. It is like this. In the Caribbean there are many, many Islands populated with happy brown people. Most of these island have their own Governments. But some other Islands are still nominally owned by European countries like France and the UK. And The Netherlands. The Netherlands own 6 Island in the Carribean. 3 are small and insignificant, laying a bit to the East of Puerto Rico.

And then there are Aruba, Bonaire and Curacao not far from the Venezuelan South American mainland. They have perhaps a population of 250.000 people combined, although there are many illigal immigrant from Venezuala, who nobody counts. A significant portion of the population has left the Island to seek greener pastures and welfare checks in The Netherlands.

Chavez has said that he will step in once the Dutch reduce their military presence. The matter has been raised in Parliament. Henk Kamp, the defense minister has assured that the Navy and Dutch Marine Corps are ready to protect the Islands against invasion.

Interesting enough the Dutch branch of the French arms manufacturer Thales is delivering an airfield air defense system to Venezuela this year. The Defender system has been developed together with Israel and a succesful test was conducted there yesterday.

Venezuela is no military threat to the Dutch force keeping the peace on the Islands. In order to get to the Islands the Venezuelans have to rule the sea and the airspace around the Islands, which is defended by Dutch frigates, patrol planes and boats.

Venezuela can not hope to be succesful against the technologically superior Dutch naval force. It can however use the hostility of the native population against the Dutch to incite violence through radio and TV broadcasting. There is a lively traffic between the Islands and the mainland in drugs which can be used as a cover in order infiltrate agents to commit acts of sabotage against the Dutch. Such an unclear and covered way of making war against a Western nation is ussually successful.

The question is whether The Netherlands holds on to the Dutch Antilles anyway. The population is mildly hostile to us, as is made clear with every election. The indigenous administration is corrupt. The air links between the Antilles and The Netherlands are a highway for cocaine smuggling between South America and Europe and a source of embarresment of the Dutch towards other European nations who are feeling the effect on their population.

The Dutch are mainly providing free law enforcement and military services to the indigenous elites. Also The Netherlands has to bail out the Antilles all the time because they keep running into financial trouble. Perhaps because the Dutch keep bailing them out? Basically the Antilles are a wonderful post for high ranking Dutch civil servants, politicians and military bureaucrats to play around in a funny little place with excellent weather, willing and abundant womanfolk and cheap servants. Playing the colonial. The bills have to be paid by the Dutch tax payer, who has also to deal with rampant crime of the Antillean underclass that is dumped by the local elites on The Netherlands. Antillians are notoriously prone to solving disputes with cheap "Tanfoglio" pistols.

No taste in guns these chaps, no taste at all.

So hand over those wonderful tropical additions to the Venezuelans. And in order to make up for all those centuries of rapacious Dutch colonialism let's make a gift of 50 thousand Antillians in The Netherlands. In order not to appear stingy let's make an additional gift of say 100 thousand Moroccans to the people and government of Venezuela. So they can help build it up. Like they are helping us to build The Netherlands up.

I am looking forward to see the local economy off after the gringo colonial bloodsuckers leave. I am sure it will go like that other success story of decolonisation: Africa.



At 7:45 PM, Blogger sxm lover said...


Interesting post.. I just returned from St Maarten and witnessed war games with French, Dutch, Columbian, and yes Venezuelan Marines! I spoke with a young Dutch soldier who told us of the participants.Being from the States we were very surprised.


SXM lover


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